Sunday, June 28, 2009

That word I am not supposed to say

So I have been that doing that thing, the word for which I have been forbidden from saying. The word is Decoupage, and David doesn't like the way I pronounce it. The dialogue reminds me of a scene from "My Blue Heaven" with Steve Martin. An FBI agent played by Rick Moranis says, "capishe" to Steve Martins character, a mobster in the Federal Wittness relocation program. Then Steve Martin's charachter says, "don't say that, it hurts my ears when you say it." Anyway, it hurts David's ears when I say it, but I still had fun.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Reconsidering my relationship with Cookie Magazine

I am a big fan of the magazine. It is the perfect genre (does it count as a genre?) for kids who can only stay focused for 30 minutes at a time. Magazines are ideal for trips to McDonald's, and air travel with young children. My longest relationship with a magazine is with "Martha Stewart Living". I started my subscription 10 years ago, and have changed my address as many times. I stuck with Martha even through the incarceration episode, the magazine size was cut in half ( I was cruelly mocked for my loyalty), but they were some of the best issues ever. I am also a fan of "Popular Mechanics", I am not going to elaborate. I once bought a copy of "Ask This Old House." I read it over and over, but ultimately decided a subscription would just fuel a fire my husband has been trying to squelch. We had an unfortunate subscription to "the Reader's Digest" for awhile. I think it resulted from an exchange between a very sad looking child and David at the door step, but I am not sure. I had a cooking magazine subscription for awhile, but I got bored. I have considered a subscription to "The New Yorker" on multiple occasions. I have thought how great it would be to mention a cartoon or a book review I read in "the New Yorker" at book club, the way my friend Nancy does, but ultimately I have decided that a subscription to the magazine would only make me feel like a dilettante.

Now that I have divulged all my magazining habits... There is one other magazine I subscribe to. "Cookie" magazine and I have had a secret thing going for two years, maybe three. Rest assured I know I am not in thier target demographic, but the articles about dealing with preschool moms make me feel so validated. The clothes articles are ridiculous, and the advertisments are so not for girls like me. But they have fantastic recipes, like sushi for toddlers (which turns out to be great in theory, but not so much in reality). I love the travel sections, again not really meant for me, but they fuel my aspirations.

So this month I saw the cover of Cookie, and was instantly annoyed. Tori Spellings advise on parenting. Really? I really have had enough from celebrities. Celebrities are beautiful, beautiful things belong on the covers of magazines, I will concede the point. But what makes people whose major job qualification is to pretend to be other people, uniquely qualified to give parental advice or to design clothes and perfumes for that matter. I really don't have anything against Tori Spelling, but I really don't care what she has to say about parenting. Maybe an article about what to look for in a nanny, or how to choose a plastic surgeon, but parenting? Are those even really her kids? Is that really her back yard, or some set?

In small print on each page of the article they describe the clothes the family is wearing, where they are from, and how much they cost. I decided to add them up, and I found that the clothes they are wearing for the photo shoot cost $4,706. Which is fine if you are obseanly wealthy. My issue is the title of the article; "Speling Lessons: All Hollywood's littlest princess ever wanted was a normal life. Now Tori Spellin has one..." Really?! Because if my little girl was wearing a dress that cost $352 we are so not going for a trycicle ride in the back yard/ movie set. Come on Cookie magazine. Give me a break!

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Happy Father's Day

This is my favorite picture of the kids with David. Happy Father's Day!

Also, here is another Father's day post about my Dad.

I like trees too

My friend Robin called me out on my Utah love blog posts today. I thought I better explain that my new love of Utah does not preclude my love of the Nutmeg state.

Things I love about Connecticut:
1. Trees, beautiful trees!
2. Humidity, I really do love it even if it makes my doors stick (I should really fix that, but it involves painting and I hate painting.)
3. When I go to the grocery they almost always have the kind of cheese I am looking for.
4. Sane strangers rarely try to talk to me, and I find I kind of like being left alone, with the exception of when I sneeze, in which case people in CT always say "bless you" (not oh no, do you have allergies, just "bless you.") And I like that.
5. I like that people say "carriages," "tag sales," and "we spent the weekend at the shore."
6. I like the CT shore (we all know RI is better, but I really only have something to prove to my CT friends here.)
7. I love that grass grows from seed, with rain water!
8. Random people I see do not make me wonder if they are related to some kid I went to high school with.
9. If I decide to hate my neighbor, instead of love them which I know is what I should do, I don't have to see them at church and feel guilty about it. This one is purely hypothetical.
10. My garden loves Connecticut too. I am a novice gardener, but I can't help but be fascinated by things growing from seeds. We even harvested seeds from the Zinnias we grew from seed last year, planted the seeds, and now those seeds are growing! AMAZING!

Friday, June 19, 2009

Drunken Ducklings

Our prolonged Utah vacation ended yesterday with a red-eye flight out of Las Vegas. My kids slept through the first leg of the flight, which was wonderful. But I failed to anticipate how they would respond to being awakened from a 3 hour night time nap. They were more than a little groggy as we exited the plane. I had refered to them lovingly as my little ducklings on previous flights, because of the way they waddled absent-mindedly behind me. Strollers usually just cause more trouble in airports than they are worth, and my kids can walk. I had them quack periodically so I knew they were still there, and becasure it was entertaining. Well, after the first flight they were slightly impared, and the obedient following turned into a very sad druncken waddle. Walking a straight line was completely out of the question. On the way to the gate I actually caught the gaze of a man who was openly laughing at us. I said, "yea, I know know were a circus act."

Eventually we did make it to the next gate. But only after stopping to buy some breakfast potato chips which resulted in ridiculous amounts of beverage requests, and I thought, "SO there is a good reason not to feed your kids chips for breakfast."

On the next flight Peter was fascinated by the safety information in the "seat back pocket" in front of him. Seriously fascinated! He poured over it for a good 20 minutes before he started to explain the rules to me. I wish they would have let him do the flight announcment. If they had it would have gone something like this, "First, turn your phone off, Mom, did you turn your phone off? Second, if you brought your computer aboard (yes, he really did use the word aboard) you need to turn it off to save electricity...In case the plane crashes in the water (which was a contingency he was totally ok with since it was in the brochure) we may need all that electricity. If we crash in the water there are slides on the wings, yea there are slides on the wings, did you know that there were slides on the wings? And there should be no fires on the airplanes, that's not safe...And no smoke either." He might have also mentioned that the other important rules to flying on the airplane are that there is no crying and no kicking the seat in front of you, if he had the attention of the whole flight. Peter takes airplane safety VERY seriously. After he was sure that he had explained all the important rules to me (the highlights of which are listed above, but there were several others that I can't remeber on account of being a little foggy myself) he spent another 30 minutes looking at the brochure, and I wondered why I brought all that other crap to entertain him.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

More adventures in Utah...

Abby and Celeste catching frogs.
and the widow-maker (saving details for Father's Day)...